It's So Punny!
by L.X.ie
Summary: I know, I know that's terrible. This is for Relle who needed some cheering up and we ended up having a pun war that I put to Oldrival/Conflict/LeafGreenshipping! I apologize in advance if you read this for the terrible puns that just might make you smile :D (I have such a pun addiction...)


**A/N: This is a derpy thing that happened between and is dedicated to my FF lil' sis Relle (and it's my Grandma's B-day today)! XP Hope you feel better. Relle! And enjoy our pun war Leafgreen/conflict/oldrivalshipping style!**

**P.S. I apologize in advance for the horrible but amusing puns coming up.**

Gary sighed, rubbing his forehead as he sat in front of his computer. He took off his lab coat and draped it on the back of his chair. It has been an increasingly frustrating day for him. First, he woke up late which meant he had to skip his breakfast to feed all the Pokemon, one of Ashy-boy's tauros started a stampede, he got stun spored by a vileplume in front of Leaf, and to top it all off Eevee decided to shred his research concerning sylveon -for Arceus knows what- so he had to completely redo ten pages.

Opening up Pokebook he checked his notifications and was about to get off when he got a message from Leaf. Opening it he saw a skitty waving an animated paw at him in a hello.

Leaf: HIIII! Oh my Arceus! They move! XD

Gary chuckled. Leaf doesn't go on that often and she just discovered that the stickers move. He knows what she's going to do. She's going to spam him.

He was right. He knew it. First came the skitty, then a growlithe, a vanillish; all moving. He's going to put a stop to this.

Gary: Are you done spamming me?

Leaf: No.

She then added a sticker of a skitty tapping on a keyboard of a laptop.

* * *

Leaf just sent a skitty tapping. She doesn't know why but it just excited her that they moved! She thought that they would cheer up Gary. He was a bit of a grump today but in his defense he did get stun spored. He was just having a bad day. Next she sent a sticker of a growlithe wearing glasses.

Leaf: Hey Mr. Grumpy Gills, want me to tell you a cheesy joke?

He replied: Go ahead.

Leaf: Okay, okay. Why do witches never ride their broomsticks mad? (Don't you dare sudogoogle this -_-)

She continued without waiting for a response.

Leaf: They're afraid they'll fly off the handle! XD

She waited for his answer to see if he smiled or laughed. Two minutes went by when he finally answered.

Gary: ...

Really? Really! That was a good one! She huffed, insulted. Maybe he doesn't get it.

Leaf: Get it? :D Fly off the handle? The handle of the broom? -_- You're taking the fun out of this.

Leaf: Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink!

Gary: ...

Okay, he just doesn't understand puns.

* * *

Gary watched the screen as Leaf bombarded him with terrible puns. Seriously, soda? A guy's getting hit in the head with a soda. That's not very amusing. He knows the pun is being because it's a 'soft drink' but still…

Leaf: A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said 'No change yet'.

Leaf: Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Leaf: Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.

Okay, now these are just getting sick. It's sad really how she's trying to cheer him up with such bad puns.

Gary: ...

.

.

now these are just sick.

Leaf: You just don't get puns. XP Get the play on words? *sigh* I guess it's just me and my feelings... *huddles in corner*

Gary smiles and shakes his head. She's so ridiculous. But he wouldn't want her any other way. When she first came to become an intern at his gramp's lab he was wary, yes he was so egotistical that he thought that a girl couldn't do his job any better. He was wrong and she proved him otherwise. She's smart and hardworking and~

Leaf: Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

He chuckled. She makes him laugh.

* * *

Okay, that's gotta make him laugh. Or at least smile. Come on! It was funny! And clever! Noah, know a, get it? Yeahhh, there it is.

Gary: *facepalm*

Leaf's face relaxed into a neutral look except for the pout on her lips. And the insulted challenge that's building up inside her.

Leaf: You're no fun.

Leaf: Don't trust people who do acupuncture! They're backstabbers!

Leaf: No one knew she had a dental implant until it came out in a conversation.

She waited anxiously for his reaction.

Gary: You have horrible puns.

She glared at the screen. Clicking on a new tab she looks up funny puns.

Leaf: A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.

Leaf: I can go alllll night.

In rapid succession she posted three puns and started a fourth before he answered her.

Leaf: The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.

Leaf: Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

Leaf: The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

Gary: Okay then, is that a challenge?

She already had the fourth pun typed so she was just going to post that one and respond to his challenge.

Leaf: Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.

Leaf: I challenge thee!

Leaf clapped her hands with an evil chuckle. Then she started copying and pasting like a demon.

* * *

Leaf just started attacking Gary with puns while he was still trying to think of his first.

Leaf: I wrote a novel about a fellow who had a small garden. It didn't have much of a plot

Leaf: I did a theatrical performance about puns. Really it was just a play on words.

Leaf: Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane. XD

Leaf: The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.

Gary laughed at the last two and finally squeezed in a pun.

Gary: Why are they're gates around cemeteries? Because people are dying to get in!

Leaf: Some people's noses and feet are built backwards: their feet smell and their noses run.

Okay that wasn't that funny.

Leaf: Einstein developed a theory about space, and it was about time too.

Neither was that one but clever of her to try to appeal to his scientific self.

Leaf: I try wearing tight jeans, but I can never pull it off. (this is actually true)

Gary laughed. "Wooow, Leaf." HIs mind created a image of Leaf in skinny jeans. A sly smile crept across his face. "She could totally pull of tight jeans." Another message beeped.

Leaf: Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

Gary cracked his knuckles and started typing.

* * *

Gary: If Beethoven was alive today, what would he be doing? Decomposing!

Leaf grinned. Aww, now he's participating! He's totally smiling on the other side of this monitor she knows it.

Leaf: What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing - but it let out a little whine.

Gary: What do you call psyducks in a box? A box full of quackers!

Leaf laughed out loud at that one.

Leaf: What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire.

She muttered the joke to herself and emitted a small "Aahhh" of understanding. To be honest she didn't get it until she said it out loud.

Gary: Two peanuts were walking down an alley. One was assaulted.

Leaf rolled her eyes. Oh, please. That one is so common it's not even that funny anymore.

Leaf: Oh, and you call *my* puns bad xP

People are choosing cremation over traditional burial. It shows that they are thinking out of the box.

Yes, Gary. Think outside of the box. Just not a coffin.

Gary: Did you hear about the newly divorced Barbie? It comes with all of Ken's clothes.

Leaf cocked her head. What? How is that a pun? Ohh, now she gets it… it's still not funny. Not at all.

Leaf: ...That was not even chuckle worthy...

A hungry traveller stops at a monastery and is taken to the kitchens. A brother is frying chips. 'Are you the friar?' he asks. 'No. I'm the chip monk,' he replies.

Gary: Dude, okay, lets stop. -_-

Leaf laughed out loud while inwardly she's thinking that she totally whooped his butt. He either can't think of any more or he's just tired of the game.

Leaf: Hahaha okay, :p Admit that the puns were funny and that I won! XP

Gary: I kinda have to admit because you have over 10 puns up there.

Leaf: Hahahaha okay just one for the road and it's kinda pervy. Kay? :3

Gary: I'm a guy, Leaf. I think I can handle it.

Leaf: The store keeps calling me to come back and buy more bedroom furniture, but all I really wanted was one night stand. XD hahahaha

* * *

Gary shook his head at her message, smiling. She's just so…. Leaf. He looked at the clock on his monitor. He should probably get to bed so he doesn't wake up late again.

Gary: I'm going to bed now. See you tomorrow, Leaf.

Leaf's response was immediate.

Leaf: Kay, sweet dreams! I'll see you tomorrow!

Gary smiled and got ready for bed. It wasn't until he was lying in bed walking that line between dreaming and awake that he realized that Leaf made him forget about his bad day. In fact she kinda made it. Her and her stupid puns.

**A/N: Sorry guys I just fixed it to the REAL story. I will say that a pushy woman was pressuring me to get off the computer. (Yeah, I needed to complain)**


End file.
